Since you are planning a small, intimate affair invite who you want to and if people are offended or ask questions just say immediate family only.

I think most people don't expect second weddings to be big affairs.

I think that it would be hard to selectively invite extended family. You could invite only aunts and uncles and grandparents and skip inviting cousins. But inviting some cousins or some aunts/uncles and not others seems somewhat rude. If there are people who you don't get along with in your extended family, you could invite them, and I'm sure they will say no.

As for not offending people, I think you might be too worried. If you aren't close with them, they will be relieved they don't have a financial and time obligation to you.

Unless you have best friends as co-workers, I would leave them off the list to keep things intimate. There is no rule that says you have to invite the people you work with, but it wouldn't be a good idea to just invite a few. The same goes with family. It's all of your aunts and uncles or none.

Explain that you are having an initmate affair with the people that are closest to you to everyone. If they don't understand, that is their problem and you will have to let it go.

In planning lots of weddings myself I know that there will always be people who are unhappy or offended. You can't win them all and you have to come to terms with that.

I didn't invite any of my coworkers, and there were no hard feelings. It'll be okay.

I couldn't invite everyone i knew and that's exactly the reason i gave which was the truth.They were fine with it and as far as i know, nobody's feelings were hurt.Most of them who were not invited actually still sent me wedding gifts ....

Watch out: some unwanted guests will hint around for an invitation. I had co-workers slyly asking about the wedding details and then exclaiming, "Ohh, I can't wait to see (your dress, those flowers, etc)!" To which I replied, "I have a large family, and a limited budget, so my guest list is highly selective."

Just be careful, if they are invited to the bridal shower, then it is in poor taste not to invite them to the wedding.
-the ceeg

What is this, the TomKat wedding. I don't think people are going to be THAT upset over not being invited. Most people understand when it's just close friends & family.

watch for wedding crashers. my H's frat brother actually wound up at the rehearsal dinner, went with us during the partying afterward, at the wedding and reception, and then the clubbing with the bridal party after the reception. he rang up The Husband a week before the wedding and said that he didn't get an invitation and was coming anyway.

i'd never met the guy.

the good news is that he didn't offer to video the wedding night (kidding). but seriously, i thought that it might actually come to something like that! be prepared for pushy idiots! don't be like me ... don't back down!