This isn't really much of a "help" thread, though in some ways (at least for me) I guess it can be. Wasn't sure where to ask. No matter where I go or who I talk to I feel like I'm the only hopeless romantic left. I never used to be particularly ashamed of it but as I get older I'm starting to feel that maybe I should be. Certainly this attitude has much to do with our gained independce over the last few decades--we've come a long way. We're no longer that helpless creature that needed a man to sustain her. We can help ourselves damn it! We can split the work 50-50, or gasp--some of us even do the sustaining these days.
So then, has it become wrong to want a guy who can sweep you off your feet and pop the question? To don the white dress and (possibly) live happily ever after? Are you weak and somehow backwards if you want any of these things?
Don't get me wrong: while I did grow up watching Disney even my 10-year-old self was able to not only recognize but wholly accept that maybe there is no Prince Charming (damn you and thank you, Kyle*, for ignoring my blatant love letters for half our grade school lives!). Maybe we can, in fact, save ourselves.
Oh, and by the way, what do we need to be saved from anyway? Ourselves maybe? 
I'm losing my train of thought here.
Oh yeah.
Even with all my childish, girly desires I can still kick ass. I'm working hard to attain my degree so I can get a proper job to support myself and do something I love while I'm at it. As much as I adore my boyfriend and makes me feel complete, he doesn't necessarily complete me. Define me. But still, I am hopelessly in love with him. Is it possible to be a sucker for love and still be deemed a strong woman?
When did it all become so jaded? Does holding on to your childish spirit keep you young or just make you.. childish? How do you feel about it ladies (and maybe gents)?
Oh, and please don't kill me.
*not his real name. It is in fact Kevin. Well I guess that kills the point now doesn't it. =D
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I think it's normal to think about getting married someday. I certainly hope romance isn't dead.
1Why would romance end if you are independent and strong? Why would love and the spirit of relationships grow cold with an education? It takes some wisdom to be take all of that into account and leave room for faith in marriage.
2You're probably not the last hopeless romantic out there. Don't go looking for love. I think it'll happen when it happens.
3Hehe! I think I share your feelings. You just want someone that you can share a very deep love with and your current relationship is ok but it is not amazing. I think that you should not settle for something that is just ok. I know that in relationships you get what you put into it but you also should seek a strong foundation to build on. I never knew I could find so much love, peace, and satisfaction in a man before I met my partner. I wanted to make past relationships work and I really tried to but now I am so glad that I did not settle. Don't spend your life searching for Prince Charming because he does not exist but I really believe that if you have taken good care of your self - mind, body, and spirit - you will really know yourself and when the right one comes you will just know it and you can have beautiful love that with some work you can sustain forever.
4I also share some of the same feelings. I don't think romance is dead. Although at times it does seem that way. I would indeed love a fairy tale romance, but that just isn't possible. You make a realtionship what it is, so good communication with your partner, and sharing your feelings could make for a very romantic relationship. Unfortunately for me, my boyfriend is about as unromantic as they come. But, he is great and I love him very much, and we have a lot of other great aspects in our relationship.
5Teehee! No you ladies misunderstand me
While my boyfriend is not
the textbook definition of Prince Charming 
, he is in my
books. I love him very very much. But as much as I love him I'm not so naive (anymore) as to let a guy define me. Like if he were to leave me right now I would be devastated, yes, but I
wouldn't be lost. I know who I am.
I just think in this day and age it almost feels like being that hopeless romantic girl who dreams of white or getting flowers or what have you is almost always being associated with helpless and backwards or whatever. People won't outright say it but I notice when some women say "traditional", they say in such a way that really means helpless, weak and backwards. Example: I've had a few friends look down on me because I want to get married. They got into this whole spiel about how it's just two men passing on property (aka you, from dad to husband) whereas I just want to get married for reasons totally unknown to me. Yes I love him and yes I don't need a piece of paper and a ceremony to declare that or make it official but it's just distressing that I find myself having to explain it at all. It just feels right to me.
That's just my experience though.
6Yes, it's possible to stay a strong woman and be hopelessly in love.
And I don't know why people categorize 'traditional' as weak, helpless, backward. Some traditional women I know are those who are strongest, ok, not in a physical sense, but in emotional, maturity, and wisdom. Calling them weak, helpless and backward is simply a misconception. They're not weak and helpless just because they appreciate and practice traditional values. On the other hand, I have all these 'progressive' female friends I've known who are actually 'weak-minded,' easily swayed and have less of wisdom while trying to keep up a facade.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to get married, having a wedding, etc. Just like there's nothing wrong to not want to have a wedding or not get married at all.
There's something I appreciate about being in a 'modern' or progressive time, it's that, people have more choices available for them. Sure, people will still talk or make comment on whatever choice you're taking, but seriously, why care about them when it's YOU, you should be focusing on?
And, no, there's no frakking need to explain yourself and your dreams to anyone, unless you feel like it.
7Amen!
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