My ex and I had a relationship that lasted for merely almost two months. During that entire time, we acted very immaturely about our relationship. We talked for hours on the phone and online, and we had fun together during the times we saw each other in person, but I always felt pressure to do what he wants to do. I never felt that he really respected me or even listened to me. He would try to make me do things that I didn't feel comfortable doing. For example he wanted me to take a nude picture of myself, but I never did for I told him that if he loved me he would respect me, which threw him off. Whenever I talked about my deepest feelings and insecurities just to deepen our relationship and to make him open up as well, he would just blow them off and say that I was "complaining" or being "too dramatic".
Ever since my ex broke up with me last year for various reasons such as that we have a "friendly type of love" and that he was getting "kinda bored", we've been talking on and off. I contacted him for a couple months, but I stopped for I realized that he was never going to change. It usually starts with him contacting me via a text, an IM, or a comment on Facebook. Then we talk for a while till he stops talking to me altogether. A couple months later, he would talk to me again, and I would respond back. It was weak of me to respond back, but I couldn't help it.
This time, he asked me to find a girl for him since he goes to a technological university and there are hardly any girls around in his school. He also said that he wants to be friends with me again. I was extremely surprised that he would stoop that low to ask his own ex-girlfriend to find a girl for him. I know that he's just using me so he could get a girl and just totally ignore me again. But his "request" has really got to me. I'm so tired of being treated like this. I'm now in an amazing relationship with a guy who treats me with the most utmost respect, care, and love. I want to talk to my ex about this, but I know he wouldn't since I know that he doesn't like to talk about his own private feelings. How should I handle this?
Chloe
No. Don't do it.
1Walk away. Hold your head high, walk away and save your time and energy for people who deserve it.
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2What a wennie. I would just say "Wow, I wish I could help but I don't know of anyone, sorry." and leave it at that.
3Just cut him off! You talk about wanting him to respect you... well respect yourself first by walking away! Don't respond to facebook messages, phone calls, or texts. Why keep this loser in your life?
4You said now you are in a great relationship? Then why bring the new baggage? He is old news and dont risk that to your new relationship. Obvisouly he acts that way because you give in and allow him. He may secretly "get off" on making you miserable! (I know thats sick!) WHY give him that power? You may never get the "closure" you deserve from him but again thats baggage that you are bringing into this new relationship. Move on and leave it at that!
5He sounds like a real loser, thank goodness he's not your bf anymore.
He doesn't sound like someone you'd need in your life too, by the way. Why waste your energy getting mad or even answering his messages?
Another thing, don't pass bad stuff like he is to an innocent girl, it's bad karma!
6Dump him, once and for all. Block his access to your facebook profile, block his screenname on IM, and block his phone number on your cell. Then enjoy a nice, romantic dinner with your current beau.
7I'm sure it doesn't make your current, wonderful guy very happy that you're still communicating with a disrespectful ex. At some point, you're risking your new relationship by keeping in touch with this dude. It's obvious he still gets to you, so just cut it off completely, or else it will get you in trouble.
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