Only recently, i've been going out with this guy. He is sweet, funny, honest and very inexperienced with girls, despite his age of 28 years. He's someone i think i would like to have a serious relationship with in the near future.
We've had sex once so far and had spent the night at his. This is the first time i'm actually spending the night over at his place, and turns out that he was unable to sleep the entire night! Making him very tired the morning after.. considering how i tired him out the night before with 3 sessions, i would assume guys would definitely get knocked out! so it seems that sleeping with me is really a problem for him..
He said that he wasn't used to having someone sleeping in his bed.
I had assumed that maybe this was his way of hinting that i shouldn't stay over. So when i suggested that i shouldn't, he was strongly against it, saying that he would want to get used to having me sleep over.
So my question is, does anyone know any way in which i can help ease the situation for him? like stick to one corner of the bed or any tips like having him drink milk or something..? Is this really strange? Because honestly i have never heard any of my girlfriends have problems like this.. *shrug greatly appreciate any help!
x,
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Vicenza
I think this is a pretty normal situation. I know that I used to feel weird having someone sleeping beside me when I was single. It always gave me that "you are not alone" feeling and I could never sleep all that well. Also, my fiancee is a VERY light sleeper so when he used to sleep beside other people every time they moved, mumbled or touched him he would be wide awake.
I suggest that before you guys go to sleep you cuddle etc and then when you two are ready to go to sleep you roll away, go to your sides of the bed and sleep like no one else was there. He will eventually get used to you being there and at that point you can maybe start cuddling a bit more but in the beginning I would just avoid touching him after you guys have decided to fall asleep.
Good Luck!
"Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it"
1I was like this with my last guy. It took almost 3 months of sleeping over once or twice a week before I could actually sleep with him next to me. There's no trick - it'll happen in time.
2I think he'll just get used to it... When I'm with someone, I always make an effort to be as considerate as possible and keep to my side of the bed and not disturb their sleep, which can feel a bit unnatural when you're used to having the bed to yourself.
3back when i first started dating my bf i would wake up to pee like 4 times per night and i was always woken by his snoring and talking in his sleep....but now, i never hear him snore or talk...and i don't believe he has STOPPED, i believe i'm just better at sleeping through it after 9 months of doing so....don't worry, i think you just need to get used to it...some people are just better sleepers than others and some people get uncomfortable when they have to share a bed (i mean physically uncomfortable...like my back always hurts more when i sleep with my bf than when he is away for work and i sleep alone...cuz i dont sprawl out the way i do when i'm by myself)....so he will get used to it, honestly don't worry about it
4Oh yeah, and like someone else said, avoid the cuddling. It's impossible for some people to sleep when someone else has their arms wrapped around them.
5Don't worry it doesn't happen with just your bf. I'm the exact same way as your bf, and I can't cuddle for the life of me. It made me so uncomfortable, but it doesn't mean that I love my fiancee less, he's the cuddler in the relationship. I'm still getting used to it, there are times when sleeping in the same bed doesn't bother me, and there are times still that I get awaken so easily and grumpy in the morning.
6He'll get used to it eventually, just don't 'cuddle' him to make him fall asleep, usually it's just impossible to sleep with someone when s/he has her arms around him.
Well, at least he's not a sweater...and I don't mean a cute garment.
I was with someone who generated a great deal of body heat and sweat during his sleep..it was like sleeping next to a furnace. His body was hot, and I don't mean that in the good way! Luckily, it didn't go anywhere, so I didn't have to deal with it long term.
Agree with others, give him space in bed and he will get used to it.
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