So, I have had many friends with infants but this case is a bit off base. I am friends with this girl, we can call her Sheri. She has been one of my best friends. Since she had her child, I have cleaned her place, cooked, run errands, even done the shopping, etc. I can understand having a baby is time consuming, however, the girl says she will call, blows me off completely. She is home and not working. Also, has cancelled plans several times. I am going through a tough thing right now and feel like I cannot rely on "Sheri" what so ever. I've had other friends with a baby a few months old and they never behaved this way. I told her how I feel but there is little improvement, she apologized but is still pulling these new stunts. The girl's husband is a total control freak, to make matters worse. Do I just give up at this point? I feel taken advantage of after running all her errands for months! Its been pretty upsetting to have lost a good friend for no reason! Thanks for the advice!!
Top Brands
Karen Millen
Brand Alley
Miss Selfridge
Well, she does not seem that good of a friend to me. I understand that having a baby is time consuming; however, you make time for someone that has done so much for you. I’m not saying that she has to drop everything in her life to be there for you, but she can at least call to say hi.
1Ditch her. YOu do not need people like this in your life. You're only going to resent her more than you already do if you keep being a slave to her.
2You're putting too much effort into your friendship. You don't need to ditch her as a friend, but you do need to stop doing things for her. Does she ask you to do things, or are you doing them of your own will and expecting reciprocation in some way? Try doing less for her, and just trying to enjoy time with her. If you don't enjoy cleaning her house, don't do it. If she doesn't seem interested in just talking about stuff (not emotional stuff... pleasant conversation) with you, give her time and space to do family things and spend time with other people.
3i don't think you should ditch her as a friend but i do agree that you should slowly start doing less and less for her. i'm sure she has been feeling overwhelmed and it was great of you to step in and help out during that time. however she needs to start taking control of her own life and responsibilities and as her friend you can give her that push she might need by slowly helping her take on her own errands.
i suggest you stay true to your friend, however. try talking to her about why she is not taking care of herself and her child. she may be having symptoms of depression. you can't carry her on your back and you need to take care of yourself first, but if you do stay by her side through the hard times, it will probably pay off by making you guys a lot closer when times get better. also, you may earn her loyalty for when you are having tough times.
overall, i think you shouldn't ditch her as a friend unless your own life is going downhill because of the sacrifices you are making. i do, however, think you should help her slowly take responsibility for her life again by letting go of some of the tasks you have been doing.
hope this helps!
4Post A Comment
To post comments, please log in or register.