Well, while I am not into chicks (no matter how much my fiancee desperately wishes I was) I do think that it's totally cool for a relationship to be so open that you can feel comfortable enough to invite someone else into your bedroom. You go girl. You are the dream woman of thousands of men across the universe.

Anyways, back to your issue. While your boyfriend obviously loves this new found interest in the ladies he is not being very respectful to your actual one on one love life. You need to lay down some rules and ASAP. It seems like these "encounters" have all happened sporadically and you've kind of just go with the flow but for your relationship to survive you need to set some strict rules for your new love life.

First of all: NO TALKIN ABOUT OTHER B!TCHES WHEN IT'S JUST THE TWO OF YOU! ESPECIALLY when you're making love. There's a big difference between Sex and Making Love. Sex is what you're having when you're f*cking around with other women, making love is what you're doing when it's just you and your man. He needs to see the difference and RESPECT the difference.

2nd: No fantasizing or banging your friends! Jeez. This should be obvious to him but he seems a little like a 5yr old with a tub of ice cream, he doesnt know when to stop so eventually.. he'll just hurt himself unless he's told when to slow it down. He needs to realize that you are holding all of the cards, everything is your decision especially who the chicks are. You are the one touching them, YOU are the one letting him touch them and YOU are the one who can say "NO" at any time. Bringing your friends into the picture is not only really bad for your friendship with them but extra bad for your relationship. If he brings your friends up again, i would beat him to death with his own arm... or... y'know... tell him to go to hell.

and 3rd: Unless you bring it up, no talking about your menage a trois. Seriously. Everything is the woman's decision, well unless he's planning on inviting some dudes up in there for him to get busy with. Actually, no... that's still your decision

I suggest sitting him down, telling him your rules and making sure he 100% agrees and understands them. He needs to start truly appreciating the gift you're giving him and if he doesnt. Just stop. And if he doesnt respect your stoppping then dump him. Simple as that.

Good luck girl and enjoy yourself. When it's no longer fun for you, then just end it.

"Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it"

You just need to say something to him. Like fallen says, set a few rules and/or boundaries so that you feel comfortable with what you're doing.

If he ignores you that's uncool. But you have to give it a shot!

I agree with the other ladies, set rules and talk about this concern to your bf. Do a compromise, like for example, do the 3some thing only once a month then other times should be just the two of you, and so on so forth.

And like pop says, if he ignored it, then you'd know he's not considerate to your feelings. Then you can be inconsiderate too like, totally stop doing 3some or reconsider if you'd really want to be in a relationship where all he care about is 3somes (or sexual experience) and not the two of you.

*Unconditional love is a beautiful thing, just be sure to give it AFTER your conditions have been met.*

I am more conservative when it comes to matters of the heart, I could NEVER watch a guy I love touching another woman during our most intimate moments. NEVER. So, my response is reflective of that.

You opened this can of worms, now unfortunately if you want this relationship to work, you do have try to set some ground rules as Fallen suggested. However, honestly, I think they will be ineffective. You've given him a taste of what most guys dream of, two girls at a time, and now you want to take it away with no hard feelings? Good luck with that one.

And trying to explain to a guy the difference between sex and making love? Sounds good on paper, but no guy getting laid by two women at once is going to give a sh@t about the difference. These are men we are talking about. YOU raised the bar and experimented with others, fine, but now you have to find a way to make him satisfied with just you. Honestly, I don't know how you are going to do that. He's already talking about f@cking other women when he's with just you. You've let other people into your most intimate moments, enjoyed them yourself, and now want to set rules? RIGHT. That will go over well.

The issue of your attraction to women is something completely different. Whether you are bisexual or gay, I have no idea, but at some point you are going to need to explore that aspect of yourself. One thing I do get from your post is that you want to be monogamous with someone, or you wouldn't be writing...unfortunately, your choices have muddied those waters. And him wanting to watch you with your friends? I am sorry, but that is just creepy to me.

If he can't let it go when you try to set rules, then you are going to have to decide if the relationship is worth it. I would be prepared for the fact that this may not be what you ultimately want.

Good luck.

Agreed with JazzyTummy. I think threesomes/ open relationships are generally a terrible idea unless all involved parties are unattached (aka: no one involved is in a relationship with anyone else). Like Jazzy said, you started this by telling your boyfriend that you were into girls and being willing to invite others into your private moments. I am not surprised that now he wants more.

You need to have a talk with him. Maybe he is just talking about other girls because he's gotten used to thinking that it turns you on? Or maybe he really does want that sort of thing. I kind of find the whole friend situation creepy as well.

Though Fallen said that you are the "dream woman" of many, that is probably all you will be, a fantasy. Just because you are open to getting it on with other chicks doesn't mean your boyfriend will be more faithful or love you more. It just means he gets to fulfill a teenage fantasy with you. While that's cool and all, it sounds like you want more. Hopefully your boyfriend will be able to take it down a notch and focus on you.

Good luck to you.

My advice is different.

I've had sex with more women than my husband, though I've never done a threesome. This plays into a lesbian fantasy that seems to be hardwired into his DNA. Very often he'll ask me to tell him about my sexual adventures because it turns him on. Sometimes I don't mind, sometimes I do. It's clear to me, also, that I've gone too far in my permissiveness of it.

I didn't expect either of us to turn off our sexuality when we got married. I know he still looks at girls. I certainly still look at both guys and girls, though much less. I'll happily watch porn with him because it's a sexual experience we share together.

So, I do understand where you're coming from. I think you might need some strong boundaries with him because he is clearly hooked on the 3some, and seems to need it to get off. If your guy is anything like mine, he doesn't understand that I'm attracted to women in a different way than he is. He might not understand it's something you don't want every time.

boundaries are necessary. you both need to communicate your feelings. anytime something makes you uncomfortable you need to tell your boyfiend. if he doesn't listen or continues behaviors that upset you then I would say that you need to reevaluate the relationship and the situation. sometimes something that was once working for you may change and you have to be open and honest about that and if he respects you and your feelings he will take the hint

You need to come to terms with your own sexuality, and then decide how to handle that within the boundaries of your relationship. Are you bisexual? Probably. Heterosexual women simply have no desire to get naked and mess around with other women.

So decide what being bisexual means to you. Do you want to someday be married and raise children with a husband? If so, how do you see other women playing in to that situation? If marriage and kids aren't for you, do you want a committed relationship with a man or a woman? Or both?

You need to figure out who you are and what you want. Only then can you ask that of your boyfriend. For now, let him know that when it's just the two of you, you'd like him to focus on you and not talk about other women. If he doesn't get it or won't agree, try talking about other men next time and see how that works for him.

Odds are, you've gone down a path that you can't go back on with this guy. Good luck to you.

I think that there is nothing wrong with having that alternative included in your sexual plyabook. I think that what needs to happen is a focus on just the two of your for a while. Ask for that sexually. Doesn't mean you can't sometimes include other girls if you want. But you should be able to have a focus on just the two of you if you want that.

He's been given the green light and your starting to resent his behavior. He's into sex with multiple women and you're crying that you are one of the multiples......that you want to be number one now. He doesn't care about you much if he can't keep his mind off your friends. You slid into number three or four or five somewhere down the road and now you changed your mind?. Alrighty then. That will be like trying to erase a sharpie marker off of a piece of new clean paper. Then putting some white out over everything and passing that off as a fresh start.