A while ago I posted a group-therapy blog asking for advice because I thought I was in love with my cousin. Most of you suggested that I go out more and meet new guys. Well, I took that advice and now I need some more help.

I've been going to school with this guy for three years so far. We have a lot of the same friends so we've always been aware of the other's presence but we didn't know each other very well. He was always just this guy who was good to have around when you wanted a laugh.

At the beginning of this year we both got parts in a school musical and that's when we started hanging out more. He became a good friend but I never thought of him as anything more than that. He never seemed to be my type.

About a month ago we both realized that we had the same huge obsession with the save video game. I began talking to him at night on the phone. We'd sit there for three hours just talking about the game and stuff that happened at school. At this time I had just lost all of my other friends so not only is he now my only friend but he's also my best friend.

A couple days ago while on the phone he told me that he wanted to ask me something and that it was a serious question. He ended up text messaging me the question because he said he felt nervous asking me any other way. In the message he asked me if I would go out with him. I realized that he said "Would you go out with me" not "Will you go out with me". I send him back a reply saying yes, I would go out with him.

I was so happy. I know how pathetic that is but I couldn't help it. I couldn't believe this was happening. I actually pinched myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming. And that night I actually got a full eight hours of sleep which is abnormal for me because I have insomnia due to depression. I even dreamt about him and when I woke up in the middle of the night I checked my phone to make sure it had really happened.

Then the trouble began.

He called me the next night and instead of video games and school we started talking about very personal things. I realized that we were both going through a lot of the same things and we were both suffering from depression. I began to like him even more as we continued to talk. I'd always wanted a boyfriend that could understand all of the stuff I was going through. I realized of course that he hadn't asked me to be his girlfriend but I thought if we went out some time like he asked I might just become his girlfriend.

After a couple of hours he brought up the fact that he'd asked me out. He said "I did want to ask you out, but not now. I didn't want to ask you yet for three reasons. One, you told me that your mother is getting suspicious of me and I didn't want to give her more reason to be suspicious. Two, your cousin seems really over-protective of you and if he finds out I've asked you out I'm worried he'd kill me (my cousin really is that protective. I swear he thinks he's my father). And three, I'm going to Washington D.C. next week for five days and I don't know what I'll do while I'm over there." That's what he said. And then before I could say anything he said the battery on his cell was dieing and he had to go.

When he hung up I started crying. I couldn't help it. I knew it was pathetic but I felt horrible. When he asked me out he made me feel special and cared about. Now I don't know what to do. I feel horrible. What if he finds someone he likes better than me at D.C.? Even before he asked me out we had been planning to go to a dance together in a couple months. What if he changes his mind? I don't deal with rejection very well. My depression deepens.

And another problem with my going out with him is that this is our last year together and then we're going off to different high schools. Do you think it's smart to make him my boyfriend when we only have a month left of school together? Why is it every time someone seems to care about me they always turn away? What's wrong with me? Please, help!