So i basically cant stand being alone EVER, almost get anxiety when i cant find somewhere to go w friends...I am dating a great man for 4 mnths now, and almost all of my gf's are dating someone as well. I dont live w him and he is a very busy professional fighter, so there is alot of times when we will go a few days w out seeing each other, and all i can do is sit and wonder what hes doing...and be bored. I always feel like I have to be doing something w someone and cant just have ME time...i then in turn end up getting antsy and calling him and bugging him, and being ultra needy by expressing how much i want to see him and miss him and when can i see him again.
We recently had a conversation about me not being able to be the "strong" girlfriend he needs me to be by dealing w the separation at times and not being so needy. He said he feels as though the only reason i want to see him and come over is because i cant stand the idea of being alone.
HELP! how do i learn to be content w out my man around, and be more independent and not worry about what hes doing and focus on spending time w myself...and being ok w it.
Vicenza
Get a hobby. Find out more about yourself. In my opinion being needy and wondering about someone 24/7 to the point of wanting to bug them should tell you that you're not being an individual. You need to find out who you are, what you like, what your talents are, what you can do with yourself, what you want out of life, where you want your life to go. Right now I'm "home" all the time, mainly because I don't really have any friends and I live with my parents. I could pick up the phone and bug my one friend, but I'd be needy doing that. Instead I just picked up some hobbies. Sometimes I would play video games, maybe guitar, sing, other times I would work on some tech stuff, do some research on random and interesting things. Continue looking for a job and taking care of what needs to be done in life. Keeps me busy most of the time until I can get to where I want to be in my life. Through it all I have realized that I am an individual and unique, and don't need someone else to validate me. Find out who you are and everything else may fall into place.
1you might also want to look at the psychology of what makes you feel that way. maybe you need to see that you are important and deserve to be happy with yourself. i felt like you do before and it was because i was unhappy with myself. i learned that i love to read, make jewelry and play cards with my little brother. i feel more confident now and that is always a good feeling.
I agree with gscott86, find out who you are and what makes you tick. they always say
when you love yourself, others will too
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