I've been dating my boyfriend for the past 4 years. He's the most amazing boyfriend. I love him more than anything. Two years ago he left for college. I'm only a year behind him in school but currently attending a local college. While we're only an hour and a half away from each other we only see each other once a month because of our busy schedules and we only talk on the phone once a week (But by choice, I hate talking on the phone). And we have the best time together. Now the problem you may ask? Well, it's a problem I have with myself. I have no reason what so ever to think he is cheating but I have that gut feeling that he is. He doesn't look at or flirt with other girls when we are together. I've also been on his email, facebook, myspace, and even his cell phone without questionable messages. There's nothing that should make me feel this way. Even friends of mine (that know both of us from high school) think I'm being crazy for thinking like this. I know they say women should trust their gut feeling but I have no proof. Why do I feel like this? Should I trust my gut feeling or am I simply psyching myself out because we don't see each other that often? I really need some reassurance or ways to prove myself right or wrong. Anything. I'm driving myself nuts!
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Are you sure there are no signs? Does he pick up his phone when you call the weekends you aren't around? Has he made some contradictory off-handed comments that don't quite make sense? Do you go visit him at school or does he always come home?
I think we have gut feelings for a reason. They're not always right though, especially if you are having this feeling because you've been cheated on in the past or something.
Honestly, the more I think about it, if you don't ever visit him at school I think he's cheating.
What if you surprised him on and off weekend?
1I agree with pop. I tend to trust my guy feelings these days, unless, like said above, you were cheated on or something in the past and are just super paranoid. I would try surprising him randomly too, even if you don't catch him at anything, see how he reacts, if he is kind of upset and not just super happy, you might have something to worry about.
Good luck!!!
2gut* feelings sorry
3Do you generally have a difficult time trusting men? Have you been cheated on in the past and it really changed your ability to trust? If neither of these are issues for you, then something may be going on. If you are not usually distrusting of men, and you have never felt this way with him, then he could be cheating. It's just tough because I can't think of a way for you to find out for sure, except, as Muirnea suggested, going to visit him at school unexpectedly. Have you tried telling him how you feel and then watched his reaction? Does he look away, or act guilty or defensive? In any case, make sure you are always using condoms with him if you are unsure.
4he prob isnt. you'll grow out of it. any chance you cheated on him and are now paranoid?
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